I don’t know about you, but 2017 approaching sends me into a bit of a tizzy. What will the new year bring? What have I left undone? And, perhaps most importantly, what have I learned over the last 12 months?
Month: December 2016
A Christmas Present
As a mother, I often feel like I am on the front lines of culture wars. This year I didn’t go Black Friday shopping. But two days later, I was forced to brave Walmart for milk (no blizzard pending).
The scene was so quiet, so serene, and the Christmas aisle was like my own pine-scented paradise. Except I was all alone. There was no warmth.
The whole endeavor to find an advent calendar was fruitless. In fact, I found nothing among the Christmas items but gift-related products. Wrapping paper, bows, gift tags, and tape.
Isn’t Christmas about spending time together?
The Year My Husband Stole Christmas
Five years ago, there was no tree, no stockings, and no cheesy Christmas card. I remember the pictures we took that season. I forced every smile.
To be honest, our marriage had crumbled. Sure, every friend and family member who was happily anchored offered sound advice:
“Never go to bed angry.”
“Always say I love you.”
And my personal favorite, “You’ll always have each other.”
But a miscarriage ruined everything. I wanted to keep trying. My husband wanted to finish his PhD. And it seemed we were in pursuit of different children.
Orbiting Grief
I made foolish mistakes in my youth. Too many involved the opposite sex.
In the last year, two of the men I gave pieces of my heart to have died. I’m at a loss.
But I’m a mother, and there is no slowing down. Only moving forward…even when I have to crawl.
It really, really hurts.